lyorn: (Default)
I know I meant to complain less. And things are not shitty all over. Basically there is exactly one personal (as opposed to state-of-the-world) thing with is extremely shitty and so annoying and omnipresent that I cannot write about the state of the Lyorn without complaining.

I had time off work the past week, and did, dunno, things. Went bouldering with R---, booked ferry, hotel, and night train for August, decluttered the wardrobe, got a new chest of drawers set up in the bedroom (much prettier), and applied for a choir workshop.

Yesterday I decided to drive over to the city to buy a Sudoku puzzle book. The things you do on a Deutschlandticket, when for less than 50 Euros a month you can use all public transport except for fast trains and long distance busses. But as the same day the train drivers were on strike again (feels like third time this winter, and I have Opinions about that), I bicycled 10 kilometres to the start of the tram line, and took the tram the rest of the way.

I got my Sudoku books, and bought some more books, and a shirt, and sweets, had lunch, and walked about 5K steps which made me worry about the next day, because my joints are mess and that much walking (Much. Hah. Six years ago this would have been barely worth putting on shoes for) usually means lots of pain for the next one or two days. But what the hell should I do? If I sit all day on the f***ing sofa, I will still be in pain. So I just do it and hope for the best while expecting the worst.

Bicycling back was nearly too much for my arm strength. This does not bode well for my plan to bicycle to work at least once a week when the weather is OK. I am extremely annoyed with myself and with every self-help book and article about joint pain, which advises, a) go to a doc early (they will tell you that they cannot do anything), b) move more (how the fuck should I if I cannot move because I am in pain and working through the pain makes it worse?) c) lose weight (yeah, sure. I'm underweight for my age), d) take NSAIDs (I'd love to, but I should not because other health issues - I limit myself to one every three days). "Nothing to be done" is bad enough. Every publication and know-it-all shouting idiotic useless advice really gets my goat.

Today, however, was not as bad as feared once I made it out of bed. I took the car into town, got plants for the balcony, and even managed to plant them. Two of the pots have been taken over by plants that really want to be there: In one case, young poplars! Now I have added one pot with horned violets and daisies, one with blue and white bellflowers and an errant horned violet, and one with Asian ranunculus, which are poisonous, but they are out of reach for Tully the Tabby, and he prefers grass anyway.

Tully is still alive and active and a very sweet cat. He wants his food, and his playtime, and his cuddles. He has also lost a bit of weight, but nothing alarming yet.

Thoughts on work and money )
lyorn: (Default)
I was at the boulder gym last Sunday, and the Sunday before that, and before that, not at all for eight months. Because bouldering is cursed. Every time I start making progress, something happens, and I cannot do it for months, or years, and start all over again with better and better technique and knowledge but no strength or balance or courage.

What happens? Well, the usual. Torn ligaments, chemotherapy, worldwide pandemic, and last summer, fragging my shoulder (rotator cuff tear and frozen shoulder) caused (or triggered) by slow and steady swimming of all things.

Anyway, ligaments healed, chemo ended, pandemic calmed down, and the shoulder, after 3 months, finally got treated and since mid-November last year I am working to get movement and strength back. Pain-free would be nice, too, but seems to have reached a plateau where I can get through the day OK but the nights are bad.

So I'm back to the boulder gym, at last. (Not to swimming, though. I'm scared.) It's close by, and large: Even if I can do only the easiest routes right now, I can still keep myself occupied for at least an hour with a variety very easy routes. And as the knowledge is still there, in my head and also in my body, progress is visible.

Also, gravity is the most unbiased of critics. You finish that route, you did it right. You fall, you didn't. I find that simpleness very un-stressful. (And very, very different from singing, where I never know if I'm doing it right!)

I am also working with a personal trainer, to get my strength back up without doing anything stupid. It's expensive, but effective.

And I feel a bit silly, because I'm in my mid-fifties and probably too old for this shit. But that's something I cannot change, so I'll just ignore it.
lyorn: (Default)
2022. Hrmpf.

Generally, one can say "this could have been worse". Of course, everything could always have been worse and it does not help those hurt by how bad it was, but still, it could have been worse and I'm very glad that it wasn't.

Personally, I had a pretty equal (it feels) mix of the good, the bad and the ugly. Only that I worked for or paid for everything good, while the bad and the ugly just dropped in like a bunch of moochers.


Cut for wordiness, bad English, animal death, and too much Kafka )

Four hours to midnight.

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